I am so sorry that you and your wife are struggling because of your faith awakening. Please remember this is not your fault, even if you are taking bullets. The hypocrisy of TSCC gets all the blame.

From real tough experiences, I believe loving your adult children right where they are religiously and setting up loving boundaries are the best ways to preserve meaningful relationships with them, until they are ready to listen. With your wife, I know it’s much harder, but if everything else is good in your marriage, I would hope boundaries would work with her too. My hubby had struggled with the church for many years and he never though I would listen to him, or even agree. But because he just continued to love me and not push me, the day came when I finally was ready to listen and my shelf fell that day. (BTW Mormon Stories 400 is the first critical thing I would listen to because it felt more safe and because I wanted to understand my unhappy hubby) I am not saying that your wife will awaken like I did, but I am trying to give you some hope because I easily could have been as TBM as your wife. There are many examples on this bourd where the TBM spouse finally was ready to listen and left the cult and the marrieage thrived afterwards. However, there are also plenty of situations where the marriage didn’t make it, which breaks my heart when the TSCC was the only problem in the marriage. I am cheering for you! Hang in there. Thanks for posting, and know you are not alone! Best wishes!