Your anology isnt as intelligent as you think it is. The major difference here is intent. A dumbass who insults someone on the street clearly had the intent to do something provocative, knowing it's extremely offensive, he's already at fault for trying to incite a conflict.
A woman choosing to wear a certain dress does not have the intention to arouse horny creeps, she chose to wear the dress because she herself finds it attractive.

Also did we forget that women get raped regardless of what they wear? Women NEVER intend to mentally provoke someone into raping them but people using offensive slurs do intend to incite a reaction . Comparing an innocent woman just walking down the street with some asshole knowingly being one is so gross. Nonetheless I agree that using offensive slurs doesn't justify assault.