Thanks, those are all really helpful points. It was definitely her boyfriend who sent the text message, as well as some voicemails threatening him to stay away. I'm convinced it was not an innocent reconnection, which I would completely support, because he wouldn't have called her boo like that and he doesn't think it can ever be non-sexual between someone and an ex. He's vehemently against me having any platonic connection with my exes and he admits he has major jealousy issues. What bothers me the most is his hypocrisy and the lying. It always has been my biggest problem. He claims to be extremely against fidelity, and that he would never do that to me even if we were technically broken up but "living under the same roof" (I ended the relationship about a year ago and that lasted for a few months though we still lived together).

I guess my biggest issue is that he lies frequently to me, while I want a relationship that is open and honest. And that he is hypocritical about infidelity and other things. He holds me to a much different standard than he does himself.

I feel like I can't trust him at all. You bring up really good points because I was convincing myself to do what's best for him and his sobriety and not thinking of what would be in my best interests. I want to bring it up so he knows but I don't want to fight about it.