The weight of this situation has yet to escape my mind since my arrest. I want to believe there is hope. Most people I've talked to about it has offered me some solace in the fact that they've driven drunk, didn't get caught, and learned to never do it again. I can assure you that I have never driven before this incident even remotely buzzed. I think carelessness played a role in my driving that night. I'd been commuting nearly three hours each day to and from school, was completely broke with no financial assistance being extended from the school nor my family, my front-left fender was completely caved in from a bear climbing on top of it, my girlfriend left me in August, and my linear algebra class was homework-intensive (I mean like 30 problems per p-set a night). I was under a lot of stress. I don't know if I just said "fuck it" or I drove full speed into a ditch hoping to kill myself. I just don't know. I didn't know my demons could ever be that dark. The lack of memory that night makes it even more terrifying to me. I've swore off alcohol when I'm feeling down.