This is always an issue that I seem to get a lot of disagreement with...
Background:
First, 礼仪廉耻 has little to nothing to do with schools. If Chinese schools are so much better in emphasizing on these four words, you should see a vast difference between behavior of the Chinese educated Chinese vs the non-Chinese educated Chinese. However, apart from language preference, you can't tell the background of a random stranger.
"Tan Ah Hock" on the IC is your identity as a Malaysian Chinese, not 陈阿福. This is exactly how I identify a fellow Malaysian outside of Malaysia! You can still keep your 陈阿福, you have your rights to have a Chinese name and you are not forbid to have one. This is to ease others in Malaysia, those that do not read / speak Chinese to pronounce your name, not ripping off your rights. If you look at the Chinese in Indonesia, you need to have an "Indonesian-sounding" name, none of my Chinese Indon friends actually go by names that are phonetically translated from their Chinese name. Please don't see having "Tan Ah Hock" instead of 陈阿福 on your IC as you losing your rights.
The greatest problem I see with Chinese vernacular school is that students are not exposed to the actual Malaysian community outside. Kids in vernacular school live in a bubble created by the previous generations and have little idea on what it is like being the minority (this is a fact!) at work place, or even the actual Malaysian society. I went to and SMK from an SJK, I learned to respect my classmates who are fasting during Ramadhan. I also learned that some sembahyang 5 times a day at the surau (some used it as an excuse to skip class but we'll just skip this part for the sake of discussion). These are small little things contributed to understandings among different races. If you have vernacular schools catering to people of specific a race (undeniably, you now become the majority in school), you expect other to tolerate the majority; we are not preparing kids for the potpourri of cultures in Malaysia!
I understand our differences and choose to respect the difference. The chance of understand who they are is just ... rare.
This is exactly why we poorly understands each other, we do not have a platform to integrate and to learn from each other. When you are young, you are not shy to ask; and when you are an adult, people feel that questions might sound stupid or even fear of it being offensive.
Just a note on "racism" in Malaysia. While there are a lot of race-based policies in Malaysia (by the gov), we Malaysians (as the people) are still fortunately not hating each other, but I would loosely describe it as favoritism, you prefer a certain race over the other . I think this is fair because it happens anywhere, and race happens to be one category that you prefer because you belong to that race. My opinion is that we prefer a certain race because it's easier for us to understand each other, to mingle around, and to bond. I'm away from home, and at any time when I see a Malaysian (regardless of his race), I'll be happy to talk to the person because we have so much in common to discuss about, things that I never get my other colleagues to understand. We can make Rosmah jokes happily because we both know Rosmah. So taking back, the common ground is what that was lacking for us to bond; we have nothing common to talk about, so much so that we are talking about the differences. A single-stream school will definitely be able to provide this platform, for everyone to establish a common ground.