I intensely dislike that your version of what feminism is, is pushed so strongly. We all cope in different ways. If I as a responsible woman has a drink, I have not now become part if the problem that you've described as drunk men raping women. If I want to send 20 messages out to my friends on Facebook and I now feel connected with them, that is a positive thing! You CANNOT compare a bad wife to a fucking rapist!!! I..I. ...I just can't be sure how to say what I feel. You were hurt lady. You were hurt really, really badly and the reason I know it is cuz I can see your pain in the bitterness you show towards people who have what you desperately wish you had, and so you find them lacking, shallow and undeserving of their blessings. That's the same logic that some of these predatory men use - she has sex with all those other assholes and here I am, I DESERVE to take what I want. Or I'm sorry officer, I NEVER woulda raped my daughter, but I had too much to drink, you know how it is.
There is NEVER a reason why ANY person who was raped deserved or contributed to their situation!! The ONLY thing I can agree with, is that you are absolutely 100% right when you say that people need to speak out when they see or suspect something is wrong.
I'm sorry that people failed you, I'm sorry that you were hurt and abandoned left to live a life with just one much older friend. I'm so, so sorry that you denied yourself of the joy of parenthood and that you question your ability to love....more sorry than you will ever know.
Please, try to embrace your own sweet soul and stop perpetuating the negative views that were forced on you and caused you so much pain. This girl is 17, she mist certainly has a Facebook account. She is in no way less of a woman because of this. You do not have to be defined by the characteristics of a different generation's view of what a woman should be. If your noodles sucked, you bread stank and your house was a wreck, it does NOT make you a lesser woman!!!! Neither does enjoying the benefits of our society and our technology. AlSO, 40 is NOT FRIGGIN OLD SWEETHEART!!!! Go live a little, let yourself feel happiness again, you deserve it and if you shut yourself away, they not only hurt your body, they stole your life. If you live a life filled with hate and fear, they might as well have shot you themselves. You are not alone and you do not have to feel alone ever....you have friends here and if you make the account I'll be your Facebook pal :)