Yes. And, no, I'm not being whiny or playing the blame game.

I was the last child in a poor family and my father was very, very controlling and he was emotionally, psychologically and sexually abusive and ignored my obvious symptoms of depression. He also never failed to let me know that I was unwanted and treated me accordingly.

Given the powerful effect parents have on their children I was pretty much broken by the time I finally managed to finish high school and had zero sense of self-worth.

My mother, to this day, only thinks of how things affect her and looked at parenting as what her children can do for her, not the other way around. She is beloved by friends and co-workers but never paid attention to her children's emotional needs and carries a lot of resentment toward us, even though she is completely dependent on me in order to save her from being alone and because of her selfishness and laziness, because she feels we never did anything to make her proud (sorry, "Mom", you get out of your kids what you put into them). Appearances also came before her children as far as her list of priorities.

There is a line from the movie, "The Royal Tannenbaums" and Dustin Hoffman is talking to two young men. One lost his parents in a war and one had parents very much like mine. Hoffman's character says, "One was orphaned by war and the other was orphaned by indifference." That line resonates with me.