I definitely struggle with this too at times. This is what I found works:

Talking to people like they’re your best friend - works really well!

It also helps thinking to myself “you’ll get the vibes you give”. I started thinking this way after I learned about mirror neurons in college. It helps give me a sense of control over the situation and reduce anxiety about it.

If I’m stiff shouldered, completely silent and look like I just saw a ghost...prob not gonna be making best friends with anybody that day...LOL. If I want things to feel comfortable and positive I gotta take the reigns and set that mood! Easier said than done but it’s a good mantra.

Do you think any of that would help?