as a teenager i feel the same way.

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I used to be really hyperactive and annoying and just genuinely did not care for my wellbeing or my education. (This was about a year ago)

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I was in the worst place of my life at a school I absolutely despised and just did really cringy things.

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Luckily, now that I am at a new school, making friends, and fitting in, I feel more accepted. I am also alot more mature and don't do as much 'edgy' stuff as I used to. Though, as I've started to think back to these cringy things that I've seemingly cast out of my mind, I still feel embarrassed, almost ashamed of how I could have done so much more than be lazy and except something good to come.

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On the bright side, I am starting to take my schoolwork more seriously, as well as working towards making goals for myself. But yeah, in short, sometimes I just wake up and feel really bad.