Create tattoo ink. -recipe is as follows. Take toilet paper and twist into an aprox 5 inch long, 2 inch wide braid. Coat the braid in beeswax hair pomade. Cut soda can in half and fill bottom half with more pomade and stick toilet paper wick in middle. Sanitize a 10x10 inch stainless steal surface (we used the ceiling of our bunk lockers). Burn the candle so that the tip of the flame is barely touching the ceiling. Wet newspapers and create a sort of smoke barrier to keep the smoke as controlled as possible, while still allowing air flow for the flame to burn. After sufficient time, scrape soot off of stainless steel ceiling and put in baggy. That’s your ink concentrate. Take a hot sauce or toothpaste cap, clean it, put a super tiny amount of soot in cap and then a drop of baby oil. Mix it up and you got some prison ink. Not my proudest confession but I actually have a few gang related tattoos using that ink. It’s actually held up well in 10 years. Anyways, the whole ordeal was a shit show. The CO was downstairs and it took the entire form of 65 inmates working together to keep him from coming upstairs. Me and a few other dudes periodically went around with socks full of baby powder and “popping” them all over the room as a ghetto air freshener. One dude took some Clorox and mop bucket and just mopped the stairs every 30 minutes to add to the aroma illusion. It didn’t work in the slightest. We had no slick plans of preventing him from coming up and doing the count. The entire top floor was hazy like a cypress hill concert, but ironically enough the guard didn’t give a shit. He never once mentioned the smell, and just continued his count like nothing was suspicious. I’m sure he just didn’t want to deal with busting someone when the entire dorm was banded together in the hopes of plentiful tattoos. Ended up running the flame for about an hour before we felt like we had enough and stopped.
This dope fiend would constantly trade his food for coffee and proceed to shit his bunk every fucking night. The guards wouldn’t do anything about it. I’ve made many attempts at prohibiting people from letting him trade off his nutrition which everyone was in accord with due to his fucking seeping diarrhea oozing ass stink. A few people who didn’t know the situation would trade him still here and there before they were made aware. It got so bad that he started doing other people’s job assignments for shots or coffee. Well Unfortunately his lack of concern over his situation caused people to go from empathetic to resentful. People started teasing him and talking a lot of shit. One day me and a few other dudes had the dumb idea to carve up a piece Of soap and see if he would smoke it. All four of us went up to him and feinted ignorance about how to even smoke the shit. He proceeded to dig through the trash for an empty soda can and went in the bathroom to pop the socket for a spark. He got as far as lighting the soap on fire before he could smell the obvious not cocaine aroma. He wasn’t even mad, he just smiled his toothless smile and said “heeeeey man, this is soap!” Laughed it off and went about his business. The end result was significantly less funny than we had intended.