Baby doll, I think you know the answer. My advice is to remind yourself how you felt when this was going on. Do you really want to relapse? I know relapse is a strong word but limerence is indeed like an addiction. I found myself able to cope better and resist temptation when I think about it in terms like that. Yes, the initial rush of intimacy feels good but you’re always left craving but never quite satisfied because he is (and probably never will be) completely available to you. Do you really want to struggle with that pain again? I understand you’re going through a hard time in life but I think it’s better to cope w healthier strategies such as exercising, learning new hobbies, or reconnecting w or making new friends, etc. instead of going back to what made you feel good in the past but was ultimately unhealthy.