I will never know your pain, but I have known my own. I had a pretty rough time in my teens. I was really depressed, had no friends, was held back in school twice, was lazy, and spent all my time playing games. My parents marraige was rocky, and I was dealing with a lot of relationship problems w/ my girlfriend from Missouri. Things were great with her but my parents did everything to keep us from talking to each other. Later she'd go on to cheat on me and I got into this state where I felt so alone. I never felt more alone. I thought about killing myself everyday. I thought of the many ways i could do it. I never looked forward to the day, tommorow, or anytime in the future. Everyday for months was just grey and dull with no real reason for caring anymore. I just wanted somebody to care, and listen to me. I wanted someone to make me feel invited and welcome.

I know what it can feel like to have no hope, and just feel sad, tired, angry and careless all the time. It's hard and it seems like no one really understands what your going through. getting the same advice over and over.

I understand that feeling.

But i learned and came very far. Your situation is not hopeless. It is not forever. It will absolutely pass. It is inevitable. Nothing will last forever. I bet if you really thought about it, you could come up with at least 100 people who care at least a little about you. Be it your family, the friends back in RI, or even if it doesn't seem like it, your teachers, and classmates.

Everything will be just fine, and dont forget that there are indeed many more reasons to live than to let go and miss out on every wonderful experience you have in store for you later in life.