The problem is I really love her. We've had really good times together but her finances and the perception of how her life should be hasn't come out so strongly until more recently.
I found out that she used to date a very wealthy man (think more wealthy than her ex in Mexico) and he wanted a life with her in their home country. She got an opportunity to travel the world and work doing what she does now and thought at the time she would make good money without him. It sounds like she left him to pursue her own career and now she deeply regrets it. She told me if she could go back she would have married him and it would have provided a better life for her and her mother. Her mom is also poor but at least her mom works everyday. My girlfriend applied to a lot of "regular" jobs and didn't get anything. She considers those sort of jobs beneath her and at her age she thinks this is a regression. She used to make $14,000 or more in a day's worth of work. To her $12-16/hr jobs is beneath her I guess.
This girl is European, I'm American. I don't know if it's in her culture or what but she said all of her friends married rich men (this is true I can see this on Facebook). She said she has "played by the book" her entire life and it has gotten her no where when everyone else bent the rule and now married.
She thinks of herself as getting old, or being on the tail end of her youth(in actuality she looks years younger than she is and is the most beautiful woman I ever seen-- add on the accent and every American she meets wants to date her instantly). So I guess he has the mindset she can still find a rich man somewhere before it's too late.
But I know she has the mindset she would rather be alone than be with someone that isn't "helping" her. In her mind I think she needs 20k-30k worth of "help".
I think she has the perception that many men "loved" her but no one would expense her. It really hurts my feelings that after all I've done for her she would simply pack up and move to Mexico like that. I can bet you no man has ever rested her as well as I have. I have been really good to her. Before all these money issues popped up we would get along so well together & I never gave her a dollar. She is actually really sweet, has taught me a lot & really made me more mature. Whatever happened last night is really bizarre.
I want to talk to her later today (I honestly didn't sleep) and tell her I want to fly and see her earlier than my 10 day planned departure, so I can see her in person and not go through this over text/phone and help her with whatever daily activities she's going through. I don't know how receptive of that she'll be. Think she will still want me to come when I planned as she has a lot of things going on with trying to get contracts before she goes overseas.
I'm honestly just really hurt. I really was thinking about marrying this girl as well as things went before last night. She had really hurt me and I don't know what to do. She also tends to compare me to be other men she dated and that makes me feel bad too. I'm the youngest high she's been with and outside of her preferred dating range. She prefers men 6+ years older. But she basically said that wasn't a problem for her when she met me.
I'm rambling again. How would you deal with this? I wish I could speak to her mom (her mom likes me) but doesn't speak English well.