Okay so, I can understand how you feel, but I just want to let you know this might not be as bad as you think it is, long run. At nearly 40, one of the things that I've liked the best about growing up is how my perspective of my parents changed. Parents tend to show you a very censored, protected view of 'them' as you grow up. The first cracks can be interesting, funny, hurtful or even scary. This has obviously been a really emotional experience for you both. But your mother has just given you several compliments. She had a very painful, emotional, and private experience that - obviously - is still very raw for her (no thanks to her parents who obviously enjoy keeping it raw - jerks!). But after her initial shock she realized she had treated you unfairly and approached you to make amends (gee, if only her parents had done the same :/). The compliments in this is that she has to have immense trust in you to open up such a painful subject. She must see you as adult enough to cope with it. And she must love you enough to admit that her initial reaction was wrong, and approach you as one adult to another to talk it over.

This has been really painful experience for you all, but long-term, this kind of thing can make your relationship with your parents deeper and more meaningful than you could ever imagine it as a kid. My own mother and I, though we have some differences and there are some things she says that still drive me nuts, have a relationship a thousand times better than when I was a teenager. We've become friends as much as we are mother and daughter, and I'm reminded of that every time we have discussions where each of us can offer or request advice from the other, or just be there to sympathize and vent!