It's actually a real shame that having very short hair is associated with illness. Did you ever consider wearing wigs, for fun? Before I went on HRT, my hairline was starting to recede. Thankfully it's stopped now, but for a while there I was coming to grips with the possibility I'd one day be forced to wear them. I was on /r/fancyfollicles and sometimes girls with alopecia sometimes post their amazing wigs an tbh, I was a little jealous :P

I also think your way of dealing with kid's questions is genius because that's exactly how kids make sense of things. I'm going to save that... the socratic method for children! :P I often get asked why I wear nail polish, and one little girl once said to me "why are you so pretty?" haha :D it was adorable, especially because she didn't mean it as a compliment, she was just genuinely confused to see a "guy" wearing makeup and stuff.

I do the same thing when they ask why Ollie is wearing a dress/a skirt/purple/flowers/pink.

Oh, you let your son dress in what he likes? That's fucking AWESOME!!! Honestly. That is so cool. I think it's terrible how we (society) pidgeonhole kids! so does he choose those clothes himself? Seriously. I'm impressed. You sound like a wonderful mother!

I can't do a cute pixie cut because I have the most hideous cowlick and have this horrible surf wave thing on the left side at the front. When I grew my hair last year I had to hold it down with clips and it drove me bonkers until I cut it.

Awwh. I bet you're still cute with a cowlick and a surf wave, but I completely understand having a peeve (or a deep seated hatred) of a particular aspect of your physical appearance. My ears stick out a bit, and my nose is a little large. I hate my facial hair with the deepest most undying passion. It just the fucking WORST. Ugh! But... can't be perfect! But I sure as hell gonna get my facial hair zapped away. Care less now about my nose and ears, but they still bother me a bit sometimes. To be honest though, I'm kinda glad I had flaws I was intensely aware of as a teen. It made me humble. It was only about 3 or 4 years ago that I learnt to love myself regardless of "flaws". I could have things a LOT worse.

I have grown my confidence over the past few years, and I think shaving helped, as soon as I did it I felt more comfortable, confident and feminine. I don't feel that people stare at me, but maybe they do, I just don't notice because I'm busy worrying about other stuff, and I have developed a "fuck what other people think" attitude, but I know that I am able to have that attitude because of my privileges.