Yes she is aware, she suggested I go to a hospital. I wish I were dead but I'm not going to kill myself. I don't know why people suggest this, they think it's a way to get help but it isn't. The system is overburdened. It's not a back door to getting in to see a psychiatrist like some mistakenly believe.

What basically happens is that they have you give up your personal belongings and shoes that they bag and lock somewhere and change into a gown. You can't go anywhere. You sit in a room full of screaming people, maybe if you're lucky you're assigned a bed somewhere, but you can't leave your position or security freaks out (you have to ask permission to go to the bathroom if you can get someone's attention in a way that doesn't alarm them and trigger hostility. I think I was the only person treated well). Then after a long time someone might stop by, usually a social worker. They disappear for a long while and you get to talk to someone who's training to become a psychiatrist (maybe). They listen to you, determine whether you're in immediate danger or not.

Apparently a neighbor of mine in the ER was in danger of suicide so they had a security guard sit a small distance away and watch them. They were waiting for a bed to open up at an inpatient facility to admit them. In the meantime I think they had to sedate the patient to calm them down. It sounds terrifying. You can't talk to anyone, they kicked the family out. If you are ok they release you, telling you to find an actual psychiatrist to get an eval and meds, which basically throws you back in the same situation you were before, but pretty shaken up by the experience in the ER and feeling more hopeless. I didn't see any homeless people there, I saw one approach reception before entering the ER and they turned him away, telling him to contact a shelter (even though he said the shelters were full and he had nowhere to go, I can believe that, not to mention the ER is light years better than a shelter, the receptionist looked awful when she had to turn him away, but also resigned).

I've done DBT, am repeating it soon to reinforce it.

I can pm you my state, I'd be surprised if you can come up with a resource I haven't yet tried, but I'll give it a shot.