I have no advice regarding how to help your husband want to lose weight. Other posters have said some really great things!

But I have a few questions about a different area this touches on. I'm curious just why you are so intent on him losing weight. It seems to be VERY important to you. Was your husband thinner/in shape when y'all were dating and got engaged and THEN gained a lot? Was your husband losing weight a requirement for y'all to be together or get married and now he's not doing it? Are you willing to be with your husband as he is RIGHT NOW for the long haul? And i mean as he is in regards to his body, not his emotional state. Like, if he was insanely happy but had the same physique for the rest of your marriage. If your answer is no, y'all need to start counseling soon.

If, even subconsciously, him losing the weight is non negotiable for you to stay in the relationship, you need to reevaluate things.

It could have come across wrong, but it seems like you are trying to "love force" him into losing weight.

My advice? Just love him. Let him be. I know that health is a factor here, and you want him to be healthy, I get that. But as everyone here can tell you, as much as you'd like to, you can't reach into someone's brain and flip that switch. That switch that makes us finally realize "it's time". It's different for everyone.

I hope y'all can work through this and be happy!