My whole life my father never actually bonded to me. It’s literally to the point that we have nothing to talk about with one another, and I lose most aspects of my personality around him because I honestly forget how to act. This has led to him being absent most of my life. We talk maybe once every couple years. And almost never directly. More in passing.

He has always been close with my sister though. They call and text all the time. He bought her first car. He sends her birthday and Christmas gifts. When he was getting physically or mentally abusive, it was never really toward her, etc.

It’s always been that way, and it’s the main reason that when my parents divorced I went to live with my grandmother (my mother wasn’t an option for me or my sister as she was a drug addict and unfit to be a mother). The rift has never got any better and though I’ve reached out to fix things once or twice, he’s never been interested.

As far as how it affected me, it really had no big negative. It really only taught me how to be a better parent to my children. And personally drove me to be successful in my own right. Since no one was going to do it for me, I was going to do it for myself. But it’s definitely bizarre to not have parental figures or grandparents for my children when you see literally everyone else having a more positive wholesome experience.