Oh girl I'm right there with you. I started working at a desk job 4 years ago after being in the construction industry (Got laid off February from my desk job, talk about bad timing) and I gained 40 pounds over the 4 years.

I decided I hated myself, harsh, but that's the way I felt/feel. I won't let my FH see me naked or even half dressed. That's not fair to him, so I decided to make a change for the both of us.

Now I'm not trying to sway you into an all out 60 minute workout everyday and blah blah (If you're into that cool, I'm just not here to pressure). I started working out with my MOH whenever I could. We would go for walks, do a few lunges and squats, nothing too harsh. I don't eat so much at night, I hardly drink soft drinks (I only do when it's a treat). My meals are a little better, for me I wasn't eating meals just snacking 24/7, which is worst than anything.

I workout when I feel up to up, I'm super lazy, but I do a 20 minute Wii Active workout which gets me going. If I feel like I can keep going I go for a small walk. So far I've lost 6 pounds and quite a few inches, not a lot but damn it feels good. I haven't changed a whole lot, just started walking more and eating my meals. Cutting out junk and soft drinks for the most part will definitely help, she said as she was sitting at her desk eating garlic fingers and pizza (cheat day for me? haha)

But yeah, I 100% get where you're coming from, I've tried on a few dresses and some were total busts and I wanted to just go home and cry in a corner. BUT there have been a few that made me feel sexy and beautiful. Don't get so down on yourself, I hate the way I look in most of my engagement pictures but I'm hoping to change it, even it's just a little bit of change for my wedding. I can guarantee you right now you are beyond fucking gorgeous, I bet you any money. Here I'll even show you one of my engagement pictures. I love the way the pictures turned out, I absolutely love my photographer, I just hated me. Lumps and bumps and an ass that would smother a tree. The one thing I regret the most is wearing the damn belt http://imgur.com/a/jI3Wz

Also, for you're enjoyment to make you laugh, here's a few where the wind blew my dress up, but I caught it. http://imgur.com/a/t59Zr