The response on some posts will say that it's your wedding and you should have it exactly however you and your partner want, and responses on other posts will lead you to believe that if you don't want to do XYZ your guests will be miserable and it will be all your fault.

I would love it if we could just stipulate up front that "it's your wedding and do what you want" posts are completely unhelpful. We all know that, but we also know that certain decisions are likely to upset people, to varying degrees, and identifying the extent of that frustration is basically why most of us seek advice here (because politeness dictates that guests never express it in front of the couple).