This will probably get buried but I suppose it would be fun to recollect the past few months of rediscovering faith in writing. I was raised Christian, then abandoned my faith after years of questioning. I recently came to embrace Christianity again.
I found Christians hypocritical. I often blamed God for suffering on Earth. If He is perfect and nothing he does is wrong or imperfect, then the suffering and sin is a mistake, which doesn't work out logically for a perfect God. This was my basis of leaving my faith. I was a total science/extraterrestrial search nut as well, however throughout my entire life I believe in intelligent design because IMO everything is just too impeccable to just happen because things were in the right conditions. However, religion was away from my mind even when I believe in intelligent design.
It was during period where ISIS atrocities were at its peak when I realised something. I forgot that humans did every single crime and wrongdoing and I was basically blaming God for the free will he gave us. True love cannot exist without free will.
I started to talk to my trusted Christian friends who've always been by my side even when I left the church. They decided to come visit me for a catch up and we ended up talking about God until we shed tears. I don't know why I came to shed tears just talking about God and love, but I did.
My fresh new journey to seek God now is based on love. Previously, it wasn't. I didn't know what I was doing in church honestly. Even now I'm still trying to figure it out.
Now I'll tell you one thing, you don't have to believe it and some of you may be cynical.
2 weeks ago, I was very late to church. I sat with some strangers. After the service ended about 15 minutes later, a lady came up to me and said, "God wants me to tell you that he loves you, please come back to him" and I started to full-on cry. It was a feeling I can't explain, but I cried very hard.
Now im not trying to become a churchgoer but I truly want to learn more about love. I realised that whatever effort I made, if there is no love, it is all for naught. I truly believe that what God is trying to teach us first and foremost is love. IMO the bible is all about human shortcomings with God making concessions each time out of love.
(You've discovered sin, but I shall cover you, you're no longer pure, but now you shall cleanse yourselves with animal sacrifice, and now, none of these are needed anymore because I've sacrificed Myself for you - it is finished.)
Props to you if you made it to the end of this post :)