My mum repeatedly tells me to be authentic and honest about who I am and how I feel with my partners. She has been married twice, one to my dad and once to my step dad. She was very young when she and my dad got married and she surpressed some of her opinions in the interest of not upsetting or losing dad. Those weren't the reason they didn't work out, but she never felt like he loved her, rather he loved who he thought she was. I don't think that was the case, but it was she felt. She didn't feel known, and it caused a lot of loneliness.

When they split she decided she'd just be her authentic self, and that has been what she's done. She always tells me how much more loved and valued she feels with my step dad, but that it has nothing to do with him or my dad, but rather with her being true to herself.

It's probably very frightening to talk to your fiancé about this, but better to talk now and see how the chips fall than risk feeling alone and like you're living a lie.

I wish you the best.