TW: pedophilia, grooming

The post I shared should still be up on my profile, but proceed with caution. I was okay with people DMing me to ask if I was alright and how to better educate their children about things like this. However, what I was not expecting was for this one guy to come into my DMs, pretend to be all concerned, telling me that I should not be blaming myself since it’s not my fault that I was so young. I trusted him and he asked me for details of what happened.

(MAJOR TW) At first, I kept it simple. When I found porn, when I found out about sexting, why I wanted the validation (my parents never gave it to me), why the situation was so confusing to a kid. But he kept on pushing, asking me how I masturbated as an 8 year old kid (????). He asked if I ever got caught, what I wore to school, if I was wet and if I had a thigh gap because he was ‘curious as to how this could have happened’.

Following that, he started asking more and more questions, if I had enjoyed the grooming, if I liked doing whatever older men told me to do. I answered truthfully, I continued because I loved the validation. But what I never realised was how absolutely fucked up the power dynamic, maturity difference was when I was 10.