Thank you for your input. I ended up sending him the following: “I’m sorry to hear that you’ve been dealing with problems alone. I don’t know what’s going on, but I recognize that it’s hard to talk about mental health and ask for help. Therapy has helped me and I’m glad that you’re speaking to a therapist. I hope that you can get the support you need.

I needed time to respond because I genuinely really liked getting to know and spend time with you and had real feelings for you, but I feel disappointed and blindsided and I would have appreciated a call or a real conversation about what’s going on. If you would like to share, I’m here for a call. “

He said “I appreciate that you’re not mad at me. It really wasn’t easy to say all that. I think the reason I texted and didn’t call was because I was really scared to see what your reaction would be and so I simply did so in the moment. I’d love to call you though to give you more clarity because you deserve nothing less than that.” And called me, where he basically said he has struggled with anxiety and depression and spoke to a therapist and realized he has issues from friendships and previous relationships and can’t give me what I want, but cares about me and wants to continue to talk not romantically or sexually but as two people who care about each other. He said it’s ok if I don’t want to be friends or if I’m mad. He was very calm when speaking and I wanted to believe him but the indifference in his voice when he spoke broke my heart a little more.

I sent him the following text after ending the call “Thanks for the call. I relate to having anxiety and depression, and I know it can be hard being at home. I’m glad you spoke to a therapist and I really hope that speaking to them helps you get into a better headspace.

That being said, I do care about you as a person but I have romantic feelings for you. I am looking to be in a relationship, but respect that’s not what you were looking for. If that’s something you are interested in the future, you can let me know.”

He replied “Thank you for being so understanding, OP. I will absolutely let you know once I’m in a better headspace. I appreciate you so much.”

I’m still very sad and disappointed, but I’m going to try to move on. I hope this dialogue helps anyone in a similar situation as me.

Thank you for your support and advice!