Thanks, you guys.
Your support and encouragement is incredible. This sub is something I think is really good.
I typed out a long winded reply over the weekend and saved as a draft on my phone. Somehow deleted it. :(
Bottom line... my ex emailed me to end it 12 days ago. In my knee jerk reaction reply (thank God) I replied understandingly, amicably, apologetically. .. under good terms... but my last sentence was the nail on the coffin in terms of my involvement... I told him I would respect his wishes and would not contact him via email or text anymore.
While it's been hard to see the days go by and have no contact back... I learned to stop looking at his profile on 3 social media sites that we interacted on that he is doing well and happy on... yay for him... painful for me.. I muted him on one and stopped looking at his profile on the other two...simply because it was hurting me to see him so happy without me. Again..happy for him that he no longer has the burden of me in his life but gah..hurts like hell to think the way to make him happy is to not be in his life. I have no clue what I did wrong. I was very accommodating to his life situation. All I can think is that he no longer felt anything for me.
I understand the reasons he stated but it doesn't diminish my pain and feelings of rejection and abandonment. He said his feelings hadn't changed but obviously they did.
Sorry for my long and late reply. Just want to thank you all for your kind, encouraging words.
I'm still contemplating posting here. He's a FP guy, several times a week and sometimes a couple times a day... I doubt he knows of this sub, but if he comes across it like I did in a link from another sub he will know exactly who I am if I do post something and I don't want to give him the power of knowing how much I care and am hurt in light of how little he cares and is over it. Does that make sense? The only reason I'm posting this here is that it is buried in the comments and most likely will never be seen by him (sorry OP).