I guess because we've been talking about my history with being blacked out on drugs/alcohol and how that has resulted in people taking advantage of me in the past (assaulted once at 15, and again at 19) / how those experiences impact my behavior in our relationship. I think I want him to understand that the consensual stuff was also an issue I'm addressing, but that during a time we were supposed to be growing closer, I was doing other things that were also an issue. And I want to hear his thoughts on it or at least give him more insight into who I am (as I type this out, I'm realizing that I'm trying to ask if he's okay with who I was, not who I am, that may be an issue).

I think by talking about one thing, i'm almost intentionally omitting the other.