I find it funny that, when bad behavior on the part of Borderlines is called out, it's often blamed on co-morbid Narcissism instead. "Borderlines don't do that! Narcissists do that! We're not like that! You were abused by a Narcissist!"

Thing is, no one, and I mean no one, has any compassion for the Narcissists. Especially the Borderlines.

Regardless of label, an asshole is an asshole. And they indeed do mean to manipulate, use, and abuse others, absolutely. It's the behavior, the actions, that matter.

If a mugger is out there robbing people, we don't concern ourselves with whether or not they "meant" to do it, or "why" - we first just do everything we can to stop them from doing it!!! Then, once the crisis is averted, we can worry about their motivations, remediations, therapy, and so on, if we want. Curtailing the damaging actions, the behaviors, is top priority. In order to do that, you have to cut the bullshit and just look at the actions, the behaviors.

If that means putting abusive Borderlines in jail for doing abusive shit, then so be it. "Mental illness" is a free pass get-out-of-jail-card to be a dickhead for too many people, especially the manipulative who are good at playing "victim," and have been spoiled rotten by enabling family. Stop the damage, that comes before misguided compassion.