idk, its a long strange personal journey, my whole life I was always greatly annoyed by religious people bashing me for a lack of belief, so i never really persued any higher teachings, associating it all with religion.

but then i began meditating as form of anxiety control back then, and was astounded to its effects on me, so i looked into it more, and through meditation i found a more personal approach to spirituality outside of religion.

and eventually i found myself at The Electric Forest music festival and ate increasing doses every day for 4 days straight, and stumbled around a psychedlic themed forest with the intent "to learn about enlightenment" while on acid for the first time.

afterwards, the only way i can rationalize the coincidences of my own personal thoughts and dreams/desires with the seemingly random occurances and oppurtunities graced to me in the actual world, is entirely too "coincidental" and I feel it has to do with opening my mind to the idea we are all very intimately connected to reality in a way we cant grasp.

For example, "The Electric Forest" was incredibly coincidental to me, I never partied in my whole life, I was a shut-in WoW nerd my whole life. But I loved camping and doing outdoorsy stuff in the wood, and loved exploring new woods my whole life.

And as a kid, I saw this movie on Cartoon Network "Princess Mononoke" and in this film, the main character finds himself in an old beautiful forest and comments "This place is magical."

So ever since then, everytime I got to visit a new forest, I would have that in the back of my head, like i was looking for a magical forest, then i ended up in a literal forest meant to spread the idea of magic while taking a drug that has very interesting implications if you take it responsibly.