Few interpersonal problems cannot be resolved by a hotdrop.

My story is in some ways quite similar to yours. I resubbed to Eve several months ago after having bounced off many years earlier. I found the newer exploration mechanics fun started earning isk running data and relic sites out in nullsec and probing down a wormhole back to Empire space at the end of the day. I joined a low sec corp that advertized themselves as being "sneaky".

At the end of one of my exploration roams a few days after joining my new corp, I came back into empire space through a wormhole exit about 10 jumps from our home base. Most of those jumps were through lowsec, though, so I wasn't exactly home free. On one of the last jumps, I flew right into a gate camp of smartbombing battleships. Poof went 125m isk of exploration loot (along with my 6m isk Imicus and 16m isk pod).

Flash forwards a few weeks. I've finished training the Covops skill, so my exploration runs are much safer. I've also joined my alliance's blops fleet in a stealth bomber. One of our hunters reports a smartbombing camp on a lowsec gate within our blops bridge range, and that a fancy faction battleship keeps warping to the same ping above the gate to drop gate gun aggro after blapping somebody. He links the character, and I realize it's the same camp I died to, and Barghest pilot is the same one who got the kill on my frigate.

Our hunter gets a point, lights his Covert Cyno and we jump in. We lose one bomber who landed too close to the target's smartbombs (which also blow up a lot of our incoming torpedoes), but eventually we kill the our target's ship, worth nearly 2 billion isk.

Now, this wasn't exactly a targeted revenge, but it was still very sweet.

So that's my suggestion: learn to be sneaky (train your Racial Frigate V, Cloaking IV, and as many levels of Covops and Torpedoes as you have time for), find a gang, and drop a blops fleet on your target.