I liked your post and the insight you discovered. It can feel like quite a jolt when an insight "hits you" like this all of a sudden.

I have had a few ugly realisations about myself in recent years: - I'm neurotic, but find it annoying in others - I'm very insecure and yet still have a sense of superiority at times - I thought I was a good communicator, but actually I'm only good at some aspects and hopeless at others (eg. With clients, I'm good at behavioural techniques like calming then down, or talking frankly and non-judgementally about relationships and sex, but unfortunately I'm not as clear as I thought and tend to abandon reflective listening when in a rush! In contrast, with dates I'm super embarrassed when talking about sex, but good at listening.)

Some things I've always known, but have become quite entrenched in my thirties: - I suspected my preferred "love languages" were words and touch and when I took the quiz, this was totally true; I actually think I'd probably miss any "acts of service" or "quality time" even if they were right under my nose! - My parents live in a cluttered house, so ever since I moved out, I've always wanted to live in a well organised home! I'm becoming more of a neat freak as time goes on and getting more ruthless about possessions than ever before. I think it's going to make it hard to live with someone! - I love babies but tend to not enjoy children once they get to talking age! I'm leaning towards childfree more and more as time goes on (though leaving room for the possibility that my feelings might change if a partner came along in the next few years before the biological window of opportunity closes). This is also making it harder to find someone!