Remember those inflatable obstacle courses? Well a while ago, my gf at the time and I were at a carnival and feeling competitive, so we decided to race through this thing with a prize on the line: whoever went down, went down on the winner. Mind you, this was a fall carnival for kids,and we're the only two adults willing to take on this beast of an inflatable.

So the race begins, and I'm instantly ahead and feeling cocky so of course I do a little trash talking. Suddenly, out of nowhere my rival racer comes flying past me on the wall climb and slips and kicks me, effectively using my face as a boost to the top. All while I stumble back to the bottom of the wall now with a faucet of a bloody nose.

I scramble back up, reach the top of the wall, and launch off the top before even looking to see what lies below. So there I am, soaring through the night sky, spread eagle and fully prepared to belly flop the pavement below all in the name of getting my peepee puffed. Another thing I failed to realize was my girlfriend at the top of the wall, waiting for some children that decided to head up the course backwards during our race. so not only am I flying to impending doom, but I'm also about to take out a bunch of little shits with me. BUT. Adrenaline kicked in and my completely uncoordinated brain suddenly decides to be a champ, and before I can comprehend what I'm doing, I did a fucking FRONTFLIP to reach and grasp the rope on the wall behind me. So there I am, blood dripping from my face, hanging by one arm from a rope, while all these kids are staring at me like I'm the second coming.

And then my gf forfeit the race because of my badass-ery. Yeah, she blew me.