As a senior in high school, my graduation, which is less than a month away now, slowly has started to dawn on me. I'm not worried or stressed about my last exams or even moving away for college and having to make new friends there, but rather, lately I've been kinda stressed about the current state of my friendships.

To be brutally honest, I don't like my friends anymore. For at least the past year or so, I feel like I've had a huge disconnect with most of them and that I'm in sort of a transition between cliques (unfortunately, my school is pretty cliquey). Like, if high school last another year for us, I really think I would be in a completely different group.

With my current friends, when I really think about it, I don't have much at all in common with them anymore. Not in a way where it's good to be friends with different sorts of people; I honestly don't know what to talk about with them anymore. They're boring and predictable (I realize this is harsh- I'm obviously biased - they're still good people though), and who knows what they think of me now. I barely even hang out with them at school anymore.

But the group of people I've been gradually edging towards? I love hanging out with them. The main reason I haven't completely switched friend groups, though, is probably because, as a girl, I'm better friends with the guys in that group, as the girls are a bit more cliquey (not necessarily in a bad way), and I also haven't had as many classes with the girls. But they all crack me up, and I think they enjoy my presence as well. I actually have common interests with them.

But this realization hasn't really hit me until relatively recently, and the timing is horrible. As I mentioned before, graduation is pretty soon, and after that it'll be really hard to establish new relationships with my old high school acquaintances- but I want to establish them so I can not only have more options of people I actually like to be with when I visit home from college, but also so I can have some friends that I actually like.

Sorry this is pretty long. But I am gonna try to do this, at least to the best of my ability. I used to hike a lot, and have since wanted to get back into it, and I know they go hiking sometimes, so next time I hear some of the girls talking about it I'll ask if I can join in- especially since most of my current friends seem to hate even going outside. If it doesn't work out, if they don't want me around, okay. But at least I can say I tried.