Even though i know none none of it is my fault, I still regret all this just because it isn't the way I imagined things turning out for me....

I used to be really active and worked in alot of physical jobs like welding and running a remote fly in fishing resort in northern canada for a couple years... I eventually went back to school to get my pilot license to continue in that industry. Summer after my first year I was in a bad car accident, hit by a teenager texting and driving. It was quite bad i was in the hospital a bit over a week with a messed up neck and spine. 3 months after that I was hit again by another distracted driver and the damage was only increased tenfold by that point.

Those accidents changed everything from me. Almost 3 years later and my whole spine is now toast. Multiple herniations, nerve and soft tissue damage and scar tissue. As a result I lost my flight medical and had to drop out of school. Career over before it began. I also can't go back to my old job running the resort because it was live in and physically demanding, same goes for welding that'll never be an option again.

I'm now in chronic pain and am still dealing with major ongoing issues with my spine and health due to the accidents. A major thing the last year has been my mental health. Depression set in hard after all this. I'm still trying to cope with it all and figure out what I'm going to do now. I have no work or education experience in any office jobs or administrative jobs where I could be sitting at a desk so that really limits job prospects because nobody wants to hire someone with 0 experience and train them too. I also have substantial outstanding student loans from flight school so I can't exactly go back to college anytime soon until those are paid off... But I also can't work most jobs to repay them either so it's a cycle.

I'm kind of just existing day to day in a haze of pain killers and antidepressants. I'm hoping it'll get better... im sure it will eventually. But I still have some pretty dark days. I'm angry at what I had taken from me at such a young age (29) by some kids who were careless.

Don't text and drive.