This thread is so depressing.

My story is about one of the very first friends I made when I moved to a new high school in 9th grade. She was outgoing, very cheerful and bubble, and loved running track and CC. We had a lot of fun that first year. Suddenly in 10th grade, she began missing a lot of school. She wouldn't want to go to parties, and eventually she didn't want to leave her home. On weekends, I would just bring a movie to her house, and her mom would order pizza for us. Finally, even that stopped. I couldn't really understand what was going on, but I was dealing with some depression and battles of my own, so it was just a dark hazy period of time. We slowly lost touch, and 7 years later when we were around 22, I got a call from my mom that my friend had killed herself. Apparently, around the age I met her, she found out she has multiple sclerosis and then developed schizophrenia as a result. This was the reason she dropped out of track/CC, the reason she stopped wanting any social life. I didn't know any of it. She had been working as the bagging/cart girl at the time before her death. She had purchased a gun, cleaned out her work locker, and decided to do it on a weekend her roommate was gone. She did it a few hours before her dad was planning to come over to take her to a movie, so he is the one who found her.

At the funeral, I met her therapist who knew of me from all the times my friend talked about me. It was really crushing to hear that and realize I could have done more to stay in contact. I don't really know that I could have done more, since I had tried, but that kind of thing resonates with you when something like this happens. I did keep all of her notes that we traded in high school (this was all pre-text, pre-social media).