Wow, I'm so sorry OP.

In college, I fell for a divorced man with 2 kids. One lived with him, the other didn't. I ended up helping him raise these kids for over a decade while their mother lived in another country. Get this, she had freedom for only $250/mo. That was the amount they had worked out with which we had to raise two kids. Oh, forgot to mention that not long after we were together, he wanted both of them.... long story, his daughter was a shut-in in las vegas while the mother was a professional poker dealer every night. No joke. Only about 7 years old and home alone every night. We got custody, eventually got married. Everything was okay but very difficult for a long time. I immediately took on the role of full time mom to 2 kids. We struggled and every month was a nightmare of bills. I finished college, got a job and then had to get a second. I worked a night shift, and life became miserable for a long time. Mom would fly home for a couple of weeks and be a huge hero, taking the kids to every fun thing in town. My ex and she always made decisions that affected me, without my input. I worked nights, and was a zombie most of the time. Our marriage failed after a long, long road of resentments that built up, even without my realizing it. I took a vacation away from home after over 13 years and realized I hated my life. I couldn't do it anymore. I had considered suicide. I left. Going through a divorce is worse than the life I'd been leading, and I was even more miserable for about 4 years.

Hindsight is 20/20, and nothing could be more true. I regret wasting my youth on a man who had already made his decision to have a family. I would never choose that same path again, even though I was very much in love. There are many fish in the sea.