If you had said that to me after my body check in the corner helped us with a breakout, AND I had been playing hockey long and well enough to play D1, I think I’d understand the context and/or not even hear what you actually said and assume you just said “nice body check”. Based on your concern and everything you’ve written here about trying to make the sport comfortable for everyone (including your own daughter), you seem very self-aware and I’m sure you give off a very kind vibe to the women on your team.

I totally understand your wife’s perspective about what getting close to someone looks like off ice . A lot of stuff looks weird off the ice, but feel totally different when you’re on. If you and she were worried you made that player uncomfortable, I will say (from a female player’s perspective) that I wouldn’t mind you moving closer to say something if it impacted the game. You could even make a “can’t hear you” motion and ask if you can come closer to avoid accidentally making her uncomfortable. Or later you could give a quick apology that you didn’t mean to move in so close, you just genuinely couldn’t hear.

Just in case you needed some validation!