Jim was watching a terrible day-time talk show when, suddenly, he craved a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Upon opening his kitchen cabinets he realized he had neither peanut butter nor jelly, which was unusual. No matter, he decided, his craving was too strong to let that get in the way. He needed to go grocery shopping, anyways. As he was looking for his wallet, he smashed his foot into a bowling ball. He recognized the ball. It was his. But he couldn't for the life of him understand how it got out of the closed box at the top of his closet and wound up in the middle of the living room. His foot throbbed in pain as he peeled his sock off. His big toe was red and swollen, and slightly bent. It was probably broken. "I'll get it looked at later", Jim thought, as he taped some cotton around it for cushioning. He got in his car, turned the key, and nothing happened. He tried again. And again. The car wasn't functioning in the slightest. "Well, shit." Jim said. Jim got out of his car and stared at it for a while, contemplating what to do. The car was a problem he'd have to deal with, obviously, but he was seriously craving that sandwich. Jim decided he'd walk to the convenience store, specifically for the ingredients of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. He understood he should probably call someone about the car, and go to a doctor about his toe, but inexplicably, the sandwich just seemed more urgent. Jim walked down the busy street that led to the nearest convenience store, slightly limping, when he saw a semi-truck skid on a patch of ice and smash directly through the front of his destination, the Swift-Mart. He hurriedly limped to the store to see the scene. A crowd of frightened looking people were gathered in the parking lot, and the sideways truck had crashed through the front window of the store, surrounded by destroyed shelves of food items. Jim saw by one of the rear wheels several smashed jars of peanut butter, jelly, and that swirly mixture kind of both peanut butter and jelly. Jim was a bit shaken by the accident, but nobody was seriously hurt, and the damage didn't look too bad, and the Quik-Mart was just a few blocks down. Inside the Quik-Mart, Jim noticed that the cashier had seemed a bit inebriated, but that was none of his business. He grabbed a loaf of white bread, a jar of peanut butter, and a jar of jelly. He noticed it was the last jar of jelly on the shelf."How lucky" Jim said to himself, and proceeded to the checkout. "That'll be uh, eleven bucks. And fifty cents, too." The cashier struggled to read the register."Oh, and uh, you want a bag, right, for your stuff?" The cashier haphazardly tossed the bread and peanut butter into the bag. Jim watched as he grabbed the jelly jar with just the tips of his fingers. Jim saw him barely paying attention to the task at hand. In that instant he somehow just knew what was about to happen. "Wait--" Jim uttered, but it was too late. The jar fell, sending shards of glass and jelly flying."Aw, shit! Sorry,man. You can get another jar by that shelf. He pointed to the empty space where Jim had gotten the jar."It was the last one." Jim said, staring at the jelly splatter. "Oh, well damn, sorry. I can refund you for--" "It's fine." Jim said, grabbing the peanut butter and bread. He walked out of the store as the reality of the situation came back to him. He probably had broken toe, his car wasn't working, he had work tomorrow, and he just wasted an hour and a half to make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich, which he didn't even succeed at. He resignedly walked back to his house, when he noticed something on the sidewalk in front of his yard. He almost couldn't believe his eyes. A pre-packaged McDonald's jelly packet, just enough to make a sandwich. Jim sighed and smiled. Today wasn't going well, but at least he would have this. He spread some peanut butter on a slice of bread and squirted some jelly onto the other piece. He raised the jellied bread, preparing to place it onto the peanut-buttered side, when a massive boom rattled through his kitchen, almost knocking him down. A large, muscular blue man had appeared, wearing nothing but a white toga, decorated with many designs at medals. His very presence dimmed all the light around him, except his own dark purple glow."I HAVE TRIED MY BEST TO LEAD YOU DOWN THE CORRECT PATH, MORTAL." He said, pointing at Jim. His voice sounded deep and inhuman, and shook the room with every word."YOU MUST NOT COMPLETE THAT SANDWICH, SO SAYS I, GOD-KING ALASTAIR." He swiftly brought his hand back to his side, clenching it into a fist. Beside him, a beautiful woman seemed to appear out of thin air. She, too was dressed in a toga, but hers was a deep black, and had no adorning. "Do not fear, Jim." Her voice was plain and familiar, but something near the edges of her words was off. It also sounded otherworldly, but in a less obvious way."No harm will come to you, if you listen carefully to what I say. It is crucial that you complete that peanut-butter and jelly sandwich. There is no time to explain now, but you must do this, you will come to understand everything later." "NONSENSE, DECEIVER." Alastair interrupted. "HIS MORTAL MIND COULDN'T BEGIN UNDERSTAND THE INNUMERABLE COMPLEXITIES OF THIS WAR. HUMAN, DO NOT LET THIS ABOMINATION MISLEAD YOU. IF YOU COMPLETE THAT SANDWICH, EVERYTHING YOU KNOW WILL BE DESTROYED. ALL BEINGS WOULD BE BROUGHT TO NOTHINGNESS. THE REALMS WILL ENTER OBLIVION. DO NOT PLACE THAT BREAD DOWN." The woman came closer to Jim, and stared into his eyes. "Jim, you cannot let this brute intimidate you. If you fail to complete this task, you, as well as everyone you know, will be subjected to an eternity of enslavement and suffering. The beauty of the twelve realms would become nothing more than the Kingdom of Alastair." "MORTAL, UNDERSTAND THAT THIS BEAST IS A DISHONEST BEING, AND MEANS TO DESTROY YOU WITH THAT SANDWICH." "Please Jim, you cannot fail to do this." Jim stared at Alastair, then the woman, failing to comprehend the situation. Yet, he felt strangely calm. The slight beginning of a smile formed on the corners of the woman's mouth. Jim placed the two pieces of bread together.