Hello! Are you tired of these women you meet in the bar going batshit crazy on you and smashing things in your apartment for no reason that you can figure out? "Yes..." Thought Jeff. Do all of the women you meet think barking like a dog in bed is fun? "No... wait what that's a thing!?" Thought Jeff. Are you just too busy and work too hard to just fall for the wrong girl every time. "Hmm... well sounds a bit pompous but I guess so. I do work over 48 hours a week... ok yes." Jeff clicked the button on the website, answering the silly intro questions.
Congratulations! It sounds like you need an arranged marriage! "Well that is why I came to this website..." Just answer these 48 questions and come on down to 1492 Genome Dr. to submit your blood sample and we'll have a list of potential brides for you within a week! "Well this does sound a lot better than going to the bar each weekend for a year to find someone... or hoping to randomly run in to a cute girl on the bread aisle in the grocery store. Although I have been mastering the art of making conversation over a baguette. Eh... who am I kidding, let's just do this questionnaire and I'll head down to the lab tomorrow for the blood test."
Jeff started the questionnaire.
What is your estimated gross income? $60,000 - $70,000 Do you have any preference on nationality? No. Hair color? Any. Do you prefer your woman to bark like a dog in bed? What the hell is up with this question!? On a typical Saturday night you are normally...? Well I'm usually looking for a mate on Saturday.
Jeff continued down the list of questions; some seemingly silly but most of them were serious. Finally at the end, he reads: Congratulations, Jeff! You've completed the survey! We know you think some of these questions were silly, but trust us Jeff... we're going to search through a VERY wide database of eligible bachelorettes for you and all of these questions are very important! We've saved your survey results and are looking forward to seeing you in the lab tomorrow for your blood draw. Please be aware that your location requires that you complete the blood draw by 2pm. "Great!" Thought Jeff. "I'll head over in the morning before work!" Jeff shut the lid of his laptop, finished off the bit of scotch he had been drinking, and headed off to bed.
Jeff woke up an hour early the next morning, his mind mixed with both excitement and concern. "I hope this is all worth it." Thought Jeff. "This service is going to cost $600 and if I wind up with another crazy girl who smashes my apartment for God knows whatever reason, I am not going to be happy... but on second thought... this could make me happy forever."
Jeff finished his morning shower, got dressed, and had some toast and a little morning coffee. He headed out to his car, a mid-grade Sedan, and drove on over to 1492 Genome Dr. He arrived and signed in. The receptionist asked him to have a seat. There were a few others in front of him. He looked around at the others waiting, two men and two women, the two girls seemed to be deeply enthralled by their cell phones, most likely just nervous or embarrassed to be in a place like an arranged marriage lab. Jeff sat down. Feeling a little anxious himself.
The guy next to him looked over. "Hey man, don't feel ashamed. A friend of mine suggested I come down here. He's got the coolest wife. They are so fun to hang out with." "Is that so?" Asked Jeff. "Ya man! They really know what they are doing here! You'd be surprised by how many people are signing up for this! It's the new way!" "Oh really?" Said Jeff. "Ya man! It's amazing what they can tell from a little questionnaire and some blood. They put it all together and figure out all the different properties of your personality. But it's not just personality, the genetics also tell so much about a couple and the possibility of their offspring!" "Whoa... ya... that's pretty crazy. But uh... you're freaking me out a little. I think I'm just going to not really worry about all the technicalities, I just want to see who I am compatible with." Replied Jeff. "Ya... sorry about that... some people don't like to know all the details... they say it makes them feel... inhuman... but it's not like that. It's just a smart way of figuring out relationships. Sorry... I hope you find the woman of your dreams. Best of luck to you!" Said the man sitting next to Jeff. A few minutes passed by. "Well, they called my name. Best of luck to you uh... what did you say your name was... oh Jeff. Ya, best of luck to you Jeff. Have a good one!" The man got up and disappeared through the door across from the waiting area.
Nearly an hour went by and it was finally Jeff's turn. "About time. I'm going to be late for work." Jeff quietly thought to himself as he disappeared through the door across from the waiting room.
Hello! Are you tired of these women you meet in the bar going batshit crazy on you and smashing things in your apartment for no reason that you can figure out? "Isn't that how all the damn women are!" Thought Ahmad. Do all of the women you meet think barking like a dog in bed is fun? "No... but I wish they did!" Thought Ahmad. Are you just too busy and work too hard to just fall for the wrong girl every time. "Not really. I am rich millionaire and I drive around in my red sports car from the future and run over policeman's toes for fun." Ahmad clicked the button on the website, answering the silly intro questions.
Congratulations! It doesn't sound like you need an arranged marriage. It sounds like you want a crazy, filthy, depraved woman in the sheets! "Yes! Yes!" Thought Ahmad. "I am too rich and entitled for just one woman! I need many! But only if they bark when I tell them to!"
You've unlocked the hidden area of our site. Here you will have a choice of the finest women we have to offer. But these women are depraved and sick! Many of them are trained, submissive women, but there is still no way we can guarantee that they won't go crazy and smash your large, expensive home. "Ah! That is fine! Just what I want! I shall train them with my large, expensive... ahahaha!" Ahmad cut himself up, his head full of (to him) silly fantasy.
Please answer the following questions:
There are no questions, you've indicated that you're more than a millionaire and you just want a collection of crazy women. So here is your list. These women have all indicated that they have no soul and they do not care at all with whom they are matched up to, as long as they are well taken care of. Being taken care is a subjective idea to each of them, so be sure to read their profiles to see what their ideal life is like. These women do nothing but train their bodies and fix their hair and makeup all day long so they are perfect if you are looking for nothing but a beautiful shell of a woman. "Ah yes, perfect!"
Please select your preferences:
Tan skin, brunette or redhead, athletic body type. Brain or no brain? Hmm... let's see what either has to offer.
Ahmad looked through his choices. Each woman appeared along with the "premium" cost of each woman. Don't get confused, the women were not for sale; the premium cost was just to ensure you could afford the lifestyle of these women and also: they were in very high demand.
Ahmad went down the list and checked the maximum number of women he could: Three of them. Each of them beauties with model quality photos and looks.
Congratulations on your selection Ahmad! Your (3) women are available and ready! Please proceed to the checkout page to complete your order.
Order Total: $180,000
Congratulations! Order approved. Please allow up to one week for final order approval and preparation of your new brides... or uh... companions.
"Oh it is so good to be rich!" Thought Ahmad as he kicked his feet up onto his desk, reclining back in his ultra comfortable, ergonomic chair. Soon he would have a collection of ultra beautiful, ultra sexy, soulless, barking, dog women.
"Hopefully they do not smash my house too much." Ahmad thought as his mind wondered off into fantasy.