just need to be truly budgeting here

Yup, I think you nailed it and recognition is a great first step. I suggest starting with a post mortem - look back at August 2019 and account for every dollar going in and out. Start with the big categories - income to your bank account, total cash taken out through ATMs, total charged to a credit card, total paid out to the credit card etc.

Then dig deeper into what your spending that credit card on - nice part about cards is they'll give you a breakout if what you spent. Mine even gives me an annual statement that breaks out food purchases vs car purchases vs service items etc.

Eating out all the time is likely adding up to more than you're guessing.

Good luck, it seems daunting now but once you get a better idea of where your money is going it will get easier and easier to manage.

Fyi, don't let others expectations ruin you financially.