I (32 F) work overnights. My father-in-law (60s M) keeps bad mouthing me and telling everyone I'm lazy. I'm afraid people are starting to buy it.

So, he’s absolutely wrong to say that about you and especially to your immediate family. 100%.

Here’s a thought, though: he’s lonely and angry and doesn’t know how to occupy himself after his wife passed. He’s for sure not taking a healthy approach to deal with those issues, however.

It’s easy to get “stuck” in your negative thoughts when you’re grieving and/or you life changes for the worse. Passing that onto others sometimes feels easier than meeting them at their regular/happier place.

His son is gone most of the week, his DiL can’t make time for him due to her job. I kinda get where his head is at. Not an excuse, but perspective.

All that being said, there’s no reason he should be directly his negativity to you. Tough position for you and everyone else. He needs a hobby or to expand his social circle. I’m sure speaking to a professional is probably off the table for him. Unfortunately your husband might have to get creative. Try not to take it personally until then ☹️

/r/relationship_advice Thread