To make a new paragraph you press the enter key if you're in a computer, or its equivalent on a phone.

I'm sorry to hear about your situation. There's an old saying though - when life gives you lemons, make lemonade. Yeah, it is a cliché but like most simple adages it is true. You can go out and find dope and get high and just prove those who are worried about you one hundred percent right. Or you could take option #2.

What does that consist of? Accept help. You said yourself you are depressed. Help doesn't have to mean meds. Personally I have gotten a lot out of discussing what I want to discuss with a counselor who doesn't pull out a prescription pad as soon as he hears keywords like "depressed" or "panic".

Be honest with your family. Frankly it sounds pretty fucking ridiculous that you have been branded an addict who needs detox simply because you went above tramadol's seizure threshold. Do whatever you have to do to make it apparent that you made a mistake at an emotional time. However you did take way over your prescribed dosage of medication, which is a huge red flag behavior to medical professionals. And you admit to being depressed and crying before taking a mega dose of tramadol. 400mgs at once is a lot. With the other eight pills from the day before in your system, you're lucky nothing worse happened.

If you really do have legitimate pain, stick to using your medication legitimately. I say this because well, if you blow through it before your refills you are going to suffer without it. To be honest by taking loads of it to "get through" things, admitting that depression and grief played a role in your dosing as much as you did... those are the behavior of someone who is on the way to being an addict or at least a problem user. Especially considering that instead of deciding to shape up and speaking to your family about them possibly dispensing your medication according to dosage instructions, your first urge is to seek out harder shit - dude, you are staring down the rabbit hole about to jump in.

Also, the seizure threshold of tramadol is well-known but to be honest a lot of people take massive doses and never have a seizure. Still, make sure you research the shit out of every drug you ever get your fingers on. If and when you do get dope, don't jump into it blind. Know as much as you can about every aspect of using heroin as you can before you make your first purchase.

Well, I'm done lecturing here. I'm high on dope and reflecting on how exactly it is that I got here. More or less I lied to myself and rationalized a lot. Just keep that in mind; you seem to be doing that here a bit.