Exactly!! ive IVed coke and smoked fair share of hard i can admit the rush feels amazing, but imo its not manageable which leads me to the huge role why i love snorting coke cause anytime seems right for a line, and the fact that everyone is clueless makes it so addictive i never feel outta place or to fucked up. ex.(whenever i would get high on blow around my mother in law she thought me and my girlfriend were sober while high, and when we were actually sober we were accused of being high lol) People who have never done it have no clue what its like. Noone has ever known about my coke use unless i tell them.

I hate doing coke alone i get very fiendy, with the right people where i can relax with and not worry bout my pile being touched or worry about people hovering over me waiting for there line i hate that shit. Mind you i refuse to do coke with fiends i cant stand the silence the stares , whenever this situation would happen i always found myself getting stressed out and doing my coke 10x faster then i would normally,also the annoyance of fiends cleaning my straw licking the mirror,one fiend was so bad she would smoke just plain brillo when the hard is gone and my god it smells awful, the only enjoyable moments had was laughing when it would run out and fiends r searching the floor.

but im glad i went trough this to learn I have to much respect for myself to let a drug control me,plus why do i want to waste money in a uncomfortable scene, i look at myself as a secretive drug addict not a fiend. always make sure your good rent food and care comes first even if you have no money left for your fix because atleast when you do get your fix you can do it comfortably, instead of blowing all your cash in a couple days to live in the moment then be totally fucked and feeling guilty and regretting it , where as if your priorites are straight you wont feel nearly as guilty, cause even if you have no money left you still have a roof and food.