Advice on dealing with 'meh, fuck this, I'm going to do it' impulsivity when resisting a persistent destructive impulse? Also, does anyone relate?

Just to add to the discussion, I remember when I couldn't stop bugging an ex for like ten years. I'd succeed in leaving him alone for sometimes years at a time but always end up contacting him again during especially low periods. Your mileage may vary and this may be totally wrong for your situation, but for me what finally made it so I could quit him was I contacted him one last time and he acted nice that time around and we had a very civil discussion about how our relationship hadn't been right for either of us and that we forgave each other for our mistakes and we agreed it was best we go our separate ways now and never speak again.

That impacted me so much. It felt like a happy ending, if that even makes sense. It gave me immense closure and I was finally able to put my feelings for him to rest and move on. It's been almost 8 years now and I have not had the slightest urge to contact him. And when I remember him I think about how kind he was to me in our last conversation and I smile. It is enough for me.

/r/BPD Thread