NAH (bound to be unpopular, I know) First, I gotta say, your example didn't make any sense to me, but it doesn't really matter in terms of my judgment. So, as someone that has mental health issues to deal with and I work overnights also, I keenly get where you're coming from. It's important for you to be able to shift your sleep schedule to compliment your work schedule. I also realize that most people don't function like that -- they don't understand that your schedule will soon be the exact opposite of theirs. Their 8pm will be your 8am. I've been working overnights for 3 years now, and my mom still doesn't get it. So, your main issue that you point out is boundaries. Waking you up isn't really a boundary per se, but a request. A boundary would be more like your mom respecting your time and not sabotaging your employment, whether knowingly or unknowingly. Remember, you can request not to be woken up "early", but to most people, 1230pm isn't early at all. It's really easy to make a mistake about it. That said, I think your response to your mom was a bit uncalled for, but she does need to work on her actions. As your schedule becomes more set, she will get used to it more. If she's continually pushing on your boundaries, I think it's time to take her to a joint counseling session with you. That may help things a bit. She may also benefit from seeing a counselor on her own as well. Support groups for loved ones of people with BPD would be a great place for her to turn. Remember that it's a process. It's not going to happen overnight (pun only halfway intended).