He’s in competition with you. He’s insecure not feeling he has the upper hand. He’s unwilling to do what’s best for the two of you, take the job that’s offered, and grow things from there. Who knows? Maybe his pay will increase. Maybe he’ll pick up new skills. And if something happens to you or your job, that 85K job is going to look pretty good in the rear view mirror, on the highway of life with no u-turn. Too bad he doesn’t think of the two of you as a team building up value together, where every success is a win for both of you.

Doesn’t sound like he’s grownup enough to get married yet. I hope the wedding planning isn’t too far along…