AMA request: A priest or a religious leader who has preformed an exorcism.

Well, I had one done on me.... But maybe it was more of a deliverance. Ok i used to know these stoner kids in high school. They had a bad acid trip which scared the annoying religious. So one day I'm walking home and these kids drive by, they uturn and pull up next to me

"hey dude were on our way to chuuuurch hop innn".

"Nah you guys have, that's not for me, and i'm not dressed for it" looking down at my Suicidal Tendencies (popular 90s band) T shirt.

"Oh come on man it's a very important serman tonight about the rapture, if anything you might find it interesting. This church is different everyone dresses like that".

"Alright fuck it, let's go" I had nothing else to do... This could be interesting. I hop in.

We get to the church. Nobody there is dressed like me. I mean they kind of are, but its all christian bands. A guy in a "Megalife" shirt approaches me and says "brother you need to ditch that shirt and get one of these". I humor him by conversing a little. He suggests I be delivered. I'm like "no thanks, I saw the movie deliverance" he laughs his ass off amd explains a deliverance is going to save my soul. If I get delivered, then get in a car wreck and die on the way home, I am automatically let into heaven tonight!

"Ok lets try it".

The sermon starts. It's a scary story. I like scary stories. I liked the story of it. At the end the preacher or whatever introduces me as a young man ready to be saved. He invites me up to the fromt of the church. At this point I feel uneasy. As if I am making a mockery of these people religion for the sake of my own experience, and I try to back out of it. My friends are like "nonesense dude, get up there, the whole church is waiting" I look back at the hundreds of people at the church waiting on me who were all in agreement, I needed this exorcism. Afteral I wore my suicidal tendencies on my shirt like a badge (oh man, I knew that was a mistake).

So I aproach the minister who sort of grabs me by the ears and starts screaming in my face "Get out of this man satan, let this man be free to walk with jesus in the king of heaven" (this was years ago, I don't remember his exact words). He moves his handa lower to cover my jugular veins. He starts SCREAMING in tongues. The whole church gets up... Hundreds of people put their hands on my back and scream in toungues. In my mind I can't believe I am doing this. It is weird. I want out. But the screaming continues. The have me bend over and scream in tongues... I don't know tongues but I try. I think the object here was to make me feel weasy... I think kids call it the pass out game. Finally it's over, everyone congratulates me, and now it makes a neat story.

The end.

/r/IAmA Thread