California Family Law attorney here (again). Let me say a few words about separation, since it was discussed below.

I read where /u/TheEarlShibe wrote: "I would consider filing legal separation papers when you leave." In California, there is no such thing. If you leave, you leave - by law, you are considered "separated-with-a-small-s." It signifies the date of separation that is end of the duration of the marriage and the end of the marital estate; thus, a Court can say "the marriage had a duration of x years, and y months" if it has to adjudicate spousal support, and it can also determine what may be community property vs. separate property. Property - asset or debt - acquired after the date of separation and before the date of marriage is presumed to be separate property, while everything acquired during the two dates is presumed to be community property.

"Separation-with-a-capital-S" is what we call a Legal Separation. That is the same a Dissolution of Marriage (divorce) except your legal status as a married person remains intact.

So, if you want to leave, leave. If you intend to divorce, let people know - above all, let him know - so you can establish your date of separation. If your husband then files the Petition for Dissolution of Marriage and serves it on you . . . no harm, no foul. It simply means you are the Respondent in the case and he is the Petitioner.

And please - do NOT listen to "legal advice" from your husband or other JWs, telling you that you will be sued for abandonment. Find a good counselor to get yourself in a better state of mind. If you need support, consider filing for either a Legal Separation or a Dissolution of Marriage, and also file a Request for Order to ask for temporary spousal support; you will have a court date set for hearing in several months (depends on how busy your county courthouse is) and ask the judge for support, even attorney fees if your husband makes significantly more than you.

Good luck. PM me if you need a question or two answered.