I think a big part of it is car manufacturers are selling cars to people who don't care about cars. Most people buy a car out of necessity, not out of interest/enjoyment/etc; if you try and sell them on 'car stuff' like the engine, suspension, chassis, etc they die from yawning of boredom.

But a 16" voice activated, touch screen, gesture controlled infotainment screen...well bloody hell, that's exactly what I need. And the door handles pop out when I unlock the car? The headlights wink when I walk up close? The cup holders are air conditioned?! Those are the types of gadgets that get non-car people excited about a car.

And now it's like people expect their cars to be nicer than their living rooms. Like my couch doesn't have quad-zone climate control, but apparently my mini cooper must have it.

The slightest inconveniences need to be solved, no matter the cost. Like "oh gosh, it takes my ac almost 2 whole minutes to cool down the inside of my car." Well obviously the answer is to equip the car with a cell receiver, build an app for android/iphone, spin up multiple geo-distributed datacenters and build out our massive infrastructure to host our app and service that allows you to turn your car on remotely so you won't be subjected to the torturous, unfathomable, horror of having to sit in a hot car for 2 minutes. But, some consumers going to get a raging boner at the thought of being able to do that, and buy the car because of it...so here we are.