the quality of my hookups with men often has a more bluntly, simply physical quality. I used to think it was more intense. These days I just think it's a different sort of energy

Yep. Totally. For me, as a man, sex with men is much "easier" even though that's not quite the right word. There's just not much ambiguity. It's more straight forward and less complicated by emotional factors. Guys know better (or maybe care less) about what I'm thinking and feeling and I'm the save with them, we both know what we want and we go for it without worrying air being too aggressive, or not aggressive enough, or a million other weird second thoughts that I can have with women because I don't understand what they think/feel and I want, more than anything, fire then to have a good time.

In my opinion, relationships with women are just WAY more complicated, but, in that way they can be much richer too. Like, when things just click, watch out. And I think, FOR ME, when that happens it's a more "holistic" click than the most intense click I've ever had with a man. I've had SUPER hot and passionate sex/relationships with a man, but not to the degree like with my wife where sex and everything else fell aside, she just kind of became my whole world, and then sex became a sort of almost spiritual experience . . . Kinda?

I don't know if that makes sense. I guess I could probably boil it all down to they're just different flavors. Men are (generally) more simple and women are (generally) more mysterious and complicated - more challenging, higher degree of difficulty . . . just depends on what you're looking for in a romantic relationship.

OP - Do you kiss guys? Some guys just coming to grips with their sexuality (or established in it too I guess) will draw that line, and, for me, that was actually a big barrier to establishing a real emotional connection with guys. Kissing is pretty magical that way. You can learn a LOT about a person from the way they kiss you.