How can I (35M) "recreate" a meaningful marriage proposal for my wife (38f)?

My husband and I will be doing this or something like it - we are happily married (just two months!) and I don't regret a thing - we had to be married in order to purchase our home together so we went for it with a small family ceremony to be followed by a larger wedding in a year or two. We got cheap but beautiful silver rings (also to be replaced by something more durable) and had a wonderful time being married in front of our families.

But, we never got to be engaged, and there wasn't really a proposal. I certainly hold no ill will about it but it makes me a little sad, especially because when I was a teenager I was more or less coerced into a secret marriage by my much older boyfriend to help him out with immigration issues and I had to act like I was married even though I didn't want to be married, and I had to keep it a secret from everyone. It was awful and lasted years until I could escape from him.

So being with this wonderful man now, getting married because I want to be his wife and he my husband, it's like getting a new lease on life and doing it right. Part of that was that I would have loved to just revel in glowing about being engaged for a while, but that didn't happen and that's okay.

But, we both agreed that he wants it to be more special and so do I so he'll buy me a necklace (just something sweet bit inexpensive) of his choosing and get down on one knee somewhere to surprise me with an actual proposal. I'll let him do his thing but I just asked him to think of my favorite places and things and take it from there.

For your wife, I'd say do the same! Take her to her favorite activity, then get favorite place for dinner, and give her a piece of jewelry she'll love that you can put on her. Maybe treat her to a spa afterward or the next day, whatever floats your boat.

Good luck! Marriage is hard, but it sounds like you guys care about each other very much.

/r/relationship_advice Thread